Resilience

I feel that this whole experience has highlighted to me that I have some resilience. Seems to be a common theme after brain injury, people become more resilient, might be an inbuilt function to damaged brains. Like the brain automatically feels like it’s got to come back ‘harder, better, faster, stronger’ 🙂 go and enjoy […]

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Sloth

I feel like I am a sloth. Everything is just so slow and I have to work so hard for everything. It’s different like I worked for other things before. E.G. exams but at least then you had a date like I could say ‘it’ll be over by 27th’ or I had an exact date […]

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Squats

I love squatting 🙂 they were my favourite thing to do in the gym pre tbi. And I was actually quite good at them (it was probably helped by my big booty!!) Today I managed to do a few while standing up with James. I loved being able to do something physical that I was […]

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Physio today

First time trying Linda’s stairs at home not as good as yesterday at her work but not everything can be easy! I was a bit worried about it but physio Victoria gave me confidence. She said how just a few months ago my left leg wasn’t really moving forward when I walked I would have […]

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Trier!

When I was a younger child kids were cruel. They made me think being a ‘trier’ was a flaw but now I think it is a strength, I’m so glad I am a ‘trier’. Like where would I be if I had just given up? I had this chat with my brilliant uncle and he […]

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Robo!

Painted the boyos of the house. Robo and Sonny today! the whole family minus Lola

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Aww :) wee Otis

Tonight had a flashback to old times. Went back Caroline’s house. She was so good and kind to me. Her and her husband Tommy were so kind to me and my family through this sh*t recovery, couldn’t even begin to repay them for the kindness and support they showed me and Linda. Tonight was a […]

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Nevermind Happy Halloween!

It’s living up to its name for me – I’m horrified! As I keep going on about Halloween is one of my favourite times of year! I love the dressing up and all the make up! I mainly love the makeup. And this is the 3rd Halloween I’ve missed 😥 nevermind head trauma it’s emotional […]

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Happy Halloween!!

Happy Halloween 🎃 my art today will probably unintentionally scare Linda it really wasn’t intentional. The intention was flatter rather than scare! Happy Halloween everyone this is my favourite time of year

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Hard to sit up

after an injury like mine it’s even a challenge to sit up. In the photos sitting up with no support a bit like how I feel like now, no support around me really. Except for the obvious – my family, James, his family and a hand full of friends. I really feel like I don’t […]

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Happy!

Today was good, had Victoria physio. We had great results today! I was working on picking up the tv remote with my ‘dodgy’ left hand, not so ‘dodgy’ anymore! We had success! Managed to pick it up and set it down about 4 times.

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Ending the weekend nicely

Wrapped up this weekend really well. Today had a lovely day with mum we chilled out together this morning. When I was showered and ready mum left me to do my makeup up. I love the being left alone to get on with it. I think it’s cause of the life I have to live […]

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Swinging Saturday

Tonight I went out with the Anderson’s (James, his mum Thérèse and his dad David) was a great night. Started in an Indian restaurant in Lisburn and when we were finished dinner, we went over to the cinema to see bohemian rhapsody. 🙂 I walked up three steps to the seats, and after the film […]

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Slipping further…

Continuation from my last post about being down after physio really crappy feeling I’ve wrote a blog about this before I think but I’m just so disturbed by it. I need to get my left hand to work cause it was always on my agenda at some point to have children but now I can’t […]

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Back down

It should be very predictable this next blog it’s about the high of physio followed by the low of reality. I nearly sure I’ve this before but just feel like it helps when I talk about it so apologies for being boring and predictable its just how i feel.

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phenomenal physio

My favourite thing happened today as usual – physio! Today was mainly standing on my left leg alone so I was lifting my right leg totally off the ground. It was hard but good – now I’m busted! And we organised to practice again on Monday and Wednesday – then Friday is the big day! […]

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Rugby fun!

Tonight my friend Sophie and I went to the rugby. I was given the tickets by the same great people I’ve mentioned before Andy Harris and his dad Stevie! Can’t thank them enough it’s always so much fun!! Brought my usual Friday night fun and unbelievably faithful friend Sophie!! 🙂 great company, great craic, great […]

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Successful physio

Tonight was another one of my favourite times of the week. PHYSIO. Victoria thinks I’m getting closer to using a stick all the time! Tonight we tested my pelvis by getting me to rock my hips back and forward sitting on the edge of the plinth my stability letting my stand by myself with an […]

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Fantastic Friday

Today has started so well and looks like it will keep being great! – stood for an hour this morning – physio this afternoon – going to the rugby tonight Probably end up with other good stuff! Brilliant. I got a feeling last night it would be a great weekend, and it’s turning out that […]

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T.T.N update!

Tonight was good. Me, my mum and my godmother headed out for dinner. Good craic was had and wine and cocktails were flowing! Was lovely to get a chance for a serious heartfelt conversation with my mum and godmother cause I feel like now most of my conversations with Linda aren’t serious. Another fault of […]

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Relearning something so natural

Heel toe, heel toe, heel toe… Relearning something that was so natural. As you already know my focus is on physio and learning to walk again. I didn’t realise how technical walking is. We all take for granted how amazing our bodies are. Think about that next time you’re going to do anything risky! But […]

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You couldn’t beat me!

I don’t like anything to beat me! It might not really sound like a big deal but it was! I was wearing Lycra gym top for physio and was in the bathroom before bed putting my nighty on. If I haven’t mentioned already putting clothes on/taking them off is very difficult with one arm/hand so […]

Read More You couldn’t beat me!

It’s not mine.

Everyone – including my parents have a habit of saying your chair. And I get it the horrible wheelchair wouldn’t be there if it wasn’t for me. Doesn’t make it mine, there is zero want or belonging there. Sorry I feel like I’ve been on a constant rant the past few posts. I’ll try for […]

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Night time turmoil

It seems to be every night at a similar time I fall into turmoil. I just want this to stop. Give over. My emotions need a rest from everything. I feel like I don’t even know how to love anymore. (And if you knew me before I was so full of love, probably sometimes too […]

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Today’s summery!

Today was a great day!! Had a lovely visit from someone very special! My favorite lecturer in university! She is such a wonderful person and gave me so much support through uni and as if that wasn’t enough she took the time to visit me in RABIU and came baring gifts today! 😀 And this […]

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Tempting offer

James set my phone on the arm of the sofa so I couldn’t quite reach it easily! And to make it tempting to reach he put a tenner on it and said ‘if you get that it’s yours but you’re not allowed to ask for help to reach it.’ Well that was an offer I […]

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Physio check in!

Today was brilliant! Got a visit from Carrie ❤ the physio I had every week when I got out of rabiu in September last year until June when she retired. Learnt so much from her and she introduced me to the wonderful Victoria. Then before Carrie left Victoria arrived all the girls together! 😀 Physio […]

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My trip out again…

Back to about forestside again… when I was there practicing the walking a wee lady stopped me and told me to keep going! She went on to explain her daughter who happened to be there too with a wee zimmer frame, was told she would never walk again because of ms, it’s amazing all these […]

Read More My trip out again…

Excited, enthusiastic and eager.

So Excited 😆 Tomorrow I’m taking my first trip since tbi Trevor to a shopping centre. I’m excited cause I’m gonna practice my walking in public! Hopefully if it goes well and it will be my first of many trips there! (And even if it doesn’t go well – if at first you don’t succeed […]

Read More Excited, enthusiastic and eager.

Raspberries

I could always blow raspberries from being a little girl but that was something else tbi Trevor took away from me. But tonight SUCCESS! I’ve mastered raspberry blowing and it’s very satisfying after not being able to do it for so long! 😛

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Someone to talk to

Today I went for a meeting with the clinical psychologist and I think it was quite helpful. It really made me feel ‘normal’ during this process. We discussed how it was normal to have ‘peaks and troughs’ during brain injury. So i explained mine is mainly in monthly cycles: Week1: okay Week 2: okay but […]

Read More Someone to talk to

Take me church!

Just got an email from my uncle replying to my last blog entry about going out for dinner for my godmothers birthday He said my dessert looked like it can feed 6, then he sent me this cause he could probably sense my guilt! https://youtu.be/PVjiKRfKpPI Take me to church ( I’ll need to pray cause […]

Read More Take me church!

Super Sunday party!!

This afternoon/evening we went out for dinner to celebrate my godmother’s birthday that my mum went away for two nights for was great we all got together to celebrate it ( my aunt/godmother, my uncle/her husband, mum and me ) was a great night! We enjoyed a lovely meal in the Ivanhoe hotel in Carryduff. […]

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Count down is on!

5 days until I’m going for a walk in forestside! Something I never thought I’d say I’m excited to go to forestside! Maybe I’ll get prepared for Christmas early so get your Christmas list in now!! Here are some videos of today’s walking with the gutter frame (excuse the massive bum, and don’t say you […]

Read More Count down is on!

Great physio!

This afternoon i had an amazing physio session! My left arm was super loose and it isn’t coming in and up when I walk anymore! And to top it all of my left leg moved back TWICE on its own when I wanted it too!!

Read More Great physio!

Podgy and proud!!

My uncle and I have a wee joke going. I had an instagram for healthy recipes I made up called nourishandnibble! It actually had some nice healthy recipes, some of which I followed someone else’s but most of which were mine. I was flat out careful of my weight and I had proudly got myself […]

Read More Podgy and proud!!

Thriving Thursday!

But in a different way. Thursday when I was like 17 was the night to be out. At that time my favourite was stiff kitten sketchy! Wooo! But tonight was great night a bit calmer than the thriving thursdays at sketchy! Though we had done the sketchy nights in the past together tonight was slightly […]

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Mental health

After seeing all the posts yesterday on mental health day it made take a look at myself. I’ve never experienced depression before. I’m not saying I am depressed or anything. But if anyone feels like they aren’t ever happy, I urge you to talk to someone, doesn’t have to be a professional, just someone you’re […]

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So broken

I feel so broken, = I can’t walk My voice is totally different I’ve changed from a positive and up beat person to someone that has become a lot more nasty and can’t see beyond the grey. I never felt hatred but I feel every morning when I wake up now. This must be a […]

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Left hand!

Last night mums friend who always brings a lovely homemade milkshake was up with the milkshake and put it in a plastic glass for me so I won’t have to worry about dropping it. I decided cause of all the left hand success with Victoria I would try and use my left hand to lift […]

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Hedgehog 🦔

James has decided my spirit animal is a hedgehog! Cause I’m small, cute and prickly at times! Quite an accurate description I think! If you look what a description of a hedgehog spirit animal this is what is found… ‘hedgehog as their spirit animal  – these people always land on their feet and go through […]

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I love to win…

…and I hate to lose even more. Words spoken by snowboarder I spoke about on the last blog. I couldn’t agree more! I think when your challenged with something like a tbi there is not a better attitude you could have!

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I will win

‘Healing never ends. I will win, not immediately, but definitely.’ Said by Kevin Pearce the Olympic snowboarder who got a tbi. He still snowboards but not competitively. So great to hear about people like this. Let’s you know you will get there! Other people have done it many times. Just keep your head down and […]

Read More I will win

Woo!!

I feel like I’m achieving!! £100 made for brain injury matters!! And for doing things I love: paintings! Anyone want a painting I’m doing them for donations whatever you want! If you would like one email: rebekahnesbitt@talktalk.net Here are some of the examples I’ve done:

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The start of the new me!

I’m starting to be ‘the new me’, I think the ‘new me’ is just how I see myself now. The new me is quite similar to the old me but maybe just feels a bit different. I think the ‘new’ me feels a little better that the acceptance has started but I think the acceptance […]

Read More The start of the new me!

Great day!

I had a wonderful Saturday. Victoria came up this morning and straight away I walked from the stairlift to the room I do physio in! Did a wee bit of stretching and stuff on the physio bed and then another walk this time with the gutter frame! We have set a date for walking practice […]

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Drowning in sorrow

I drown every morning. It’s really the simple things in life. It’s the stupid things you don’t think about. I know this is a bit random and it never would have crossed my mind before but there is something I really want to do now. Get the bus into town. There I said it it […]

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Fun filled!

This evening was fun filled thanks to andy harris and his dad who kindly lent me their rugby tickets to go and see Ulster play tonight. I brought my faithful friday friend Sophie with me. We had a brilliant evening so I’d like to thank the Harris’s. THANK YOU

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Excitement!

Went to Florrie’s tonight to see my grandparents and my fabulous uncle T!! I was sitting beside this picture of my graduation 4 years ago but I have no memory of it even when I see the photo 😦 But good news! I managed to walk from the car up 2 steps into the house. […]

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Broke down

I’m feeling so broken down. Just had words with my parents didn’t mean to be horrid I was just frustrated. I wasn’t horrible I just said very sharply to dad when he was pushing me to the door ‘watch the walls!’ Also I said to both my parents ‘who thinks they will depend on their […]

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Trevor makes me so blue

So blue I’m like a navy/black. It’s like I feel totally helpless. This injury is just so so unfair. Cos like you look totally normal (not that I’m not glad of this) but at the same time it might be easier if I looked a bit messed up and wouldn’t have to worry about explaining […]

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Great walking tonight!

Went to a venue tonight with mum, dad and the physio! It was so great! So great!!! Did 4 laps around 3 with the gutter frame and 1 with the physio pretending to be my walking stick! I know previously I said I would pick a walking stick over a gutter frame but now this […]

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Sunday Delight!

Today was delightful. Was invited to Christine’s for Sunday afternoon/evening and it was a wee get together for Keith (her husbands) birthday. I thought it was a brilliant day. I walked everywhere (with James’s help) 🙂 Up the steps, in the front door, all around the house. The only time I was in the wheelchair […]

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Saturday afternoon/evening.

Was a super one. James and I went out together and it really felt like a ‘date day’-loves young dream-minus the serious tag along aka. TBI. We’ll rename him/it. Trevor Bernard Irvine. But regardless of Trevor today was brilliant! Started of in Cloth Ear then Cafe Nero, then the Harp bar then had dinner in […]

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Consistent changing!

I’ve been moving my left (not working leg) back for 3 days in a row! Though it’s not very long there is no going back, having a positive mind and as the physio says the path is established and there is no going back!! Definitely not! I’ll be trying to do it everyday til I […]

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Fantastic night :)

My usual Friday night friend Sophie took me out to the cinema tonight! It was so good cause she helped me into the front seat of her car and when I was in the cinema she assisted me into a normal cinema seat! We saw ‘Night School’ and it was good! Actually couldn’t replace a […]

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Loser left leg!

Seems to turning into a winner!! 😃 My p.a and I were upstairs and I was getting on the stairlift and my left leg managed to take a step back!! Physio Victoria was here after and she said consistently my left leg has been behaving! Wooooo!! So happy my ‘stupid’ left leg is improving and […]

Read More Loser left leg!

Party!!

Woohoo down in auntie Karen’s for a party night and walked in the front door and right into the living room!

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:)

Physio Victoria was here this evening and we practiced on gutter frame again. My left leg is definitely improving 🙂 we are trying to plan taking a trip to Linda’s work soon to allow me a proper space to practice the walking 🙂 she mentioned ‘ataxia’ in my left leg so we need to watch […]

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I cracked the whip!

Since it was my hellish anniversary I decided to spend it at mine and James’s for dinner and a chill out. I cracked the whip in the kitchen! So he made us dinner. Since he’s not a Michelin Star chef like me he made a children’s stable meal: sausages and baked potato!! Was easy enough […]

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Horrible anniversary continued…

Just received an email from my wonderful uncle replying to my last post horrible anniversary… “Happy Anniversary Rebekah. 25th September is the day that I will always remember that my niece is an inspirational, courageous survivor.” Such a lovely way to put into words a horrible anniversary! Now you should understand why I always go […]

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Rambo!!

Mum and I were talking and we had mentioned Robo ( dad/Robert ) and I can’t remember exactly what we were saying but Linda said something including ‘that’s too adventurous for Robo, that’s more Rambo!’ Luckily he wasn’t here to hear or react. Even if he was he probably wouldn’t have much to say! Linda […]

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Dinner!

To finish off our holiday right and give mum a nice end to her week we decided to get a Chinese for dinner! And cause I was feeling brave I got on the phone myself and ordered 3 separate dishes for everyone. This is a real challenge for me while I work to regain my […]

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Funny pop!

My ‘pop’, my grandfather is funny. Hes got a terrible memory so he keeps turning things you need off e.g. heating timer, water heater, tv you have set to record a program, and everyone (my mum, my uncle, my granny) keeps getting at him. So he turned round and said ‘the only thing that I […]

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Home time!

😦 holiday over partly sad but also looking forward to more physio. Enniskillen was way nicer than I expected. In the words of terminator ‘Ill be back!’

Read More Home time!

Stuck on me.

I’m totally hung up on walking. Even though it’s getting way better I just won’t be happy until I’m doing it with ease all the time.

Read More Stuck on me.

Amusia!

Wikipedia: Amusia is a musical disorder that appears mainly as a defect in processing pitch but also encompasses musical memory and recognition.[1] Two main classifications of amusia exist: acquired amusia, which occurs as a result of brain damage, and congenital amusia, which results from a music-processing anomaly present since birth. I think I have acquired […]

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Holiday weekend :)

Today was the start of the first weekend away! Holiday weekend! Woohoo 🎉 Started today with a not so good thing for the weekend James went home 😦 so the rest of holiday I’ll be flying solo! But it got better! Me mum granny pop and my uncles went for a drive through Enniskillen and […]

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Wick arm!!

Physio Victoria doesn’t let me call my left arm what I usually call it (wick, rubbish or crap) she’s tells it not to listen to me when I say horrible stuff about it. But all joking aside I’m thinking about if it never works. How are you supposed to feed your baby if you only […]

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Woohoo

So this happened today! This is great to think this is only me 1 year out of hospital. Hopefully it will only get better!

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SSSW

Stretching Standing Stimulating Walking My lovely physio has given me these to do as holiday homework and today is the first day I’m going to put them in action! (Hopefully I’ll have a good next update after doing sssw to fill you in on)

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You are my mountain…

Biffy clyro gig tonight in the waterfront. Was excellent and probably the 5th time I’ve seen them and every time is excellent and makes me love them more 🙂 And I know I’ve said before about Ed getting me through rabiu but when I think about it Biffy share that to! I’ve loved them for […]

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Lovely evening!

Tonight there was a wee family get together James took me to! Was lovely and a real chance to meet some of the family properly cause there was people over visiting from far of places! (E.g Canada) Was brilliant I got to re-meet some people who I had met before the knock on the head […]

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What have I become?

I detest everything so much. I just had experience that was horrible and as much as I’ve probably wanted to do it before I was able to contain myself. I slapped Robert on the head. Though it wasn’t hard enough to be sore I still feel awful and ashamed. What has happened to me? I […]

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Shilly!

Linda was helping me put my nighty on before getting in to bed. And as with most brain injuries there’s a ‘crap’ side, mine is my left. So when you are putting clothes (tops etc) on your suppose to start with your weak/crap side but tonight Linda slipped up! She put my right arm (good […]

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Forestside!

Haha physio Victoria and I now have set a new goal. Walk around Forestside on the gutter frame!! Haha we think around the end of October. That’s the goal anyway! Robert better get prepared with his credit card!!

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Painting again

I’ve started painting flat out. Another one finished today for my friend who moved to Dublin a few years ago. I did City Hall for him 🙂 this is a painting I did for another friend who plays the guitar 🎸 And this is what I look like in my art studio! Haha!

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2019!

I am really feeling down right now. Linda just said about me living here in 2019 and it really disturbed me. I always thought I would be going home in 2019 but looking at it now I suppose Linda is right I’d have to be so much more able to do things myself. Just not […]

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Baby thumb!!

My mind must be so mixed up. Mum and I were just getting sorted for sleep and my splint needed to go on and my little finger wasn’t right so I said to Linda ‘need to watch my baby thumb!’ It was only when it was to late I realized what I had said incorrectly. […]

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Party successful!

Chris and Ana came over tonight and it was lovely to see them 🙂 such lovely, great and faithful friends to have! Had a bit of craic and tried to plan our next get together. We have decided it will have a takeaway, a few drinks and good fun!

Read More Party successful!

Make it a good one!

You know the way people say ‘ life is a joke’ when life doesn’t go right etc. well my response is either: If life is a joke let’s make it a good one! Or else If life is a joke the joke is on us. But I think i prefer the first one! Make it […]

Read More Make it a good one!

Great night :)

I went down to mine and James’ house tonight! Was brilliant! May I add WALKED in from the car, down the driveway, up the steps, down the hall, in to the kitchen and got on one of the sofas! Then got to enjoy a Jamie Oliver pasta sauce i made this morning and watch some […]

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Fantastic time

This afternoon went to Orangefield park! Practiced my walking a wee bit but not too much cause I knew I had physio tonight which i am so looking forward too! But strangely enough in the park a man helped me by getting the wheelchair for me when I was ready to sit down and he […]

Read More Fantastic time

Overjoyed

Today physio Victoria took me to a community hall to let me practice my walking with the gutter frame It was the first time I’ve felt comfortable using the gutter frame and next challenge is to walk outside.

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Great night too!

Tonight was great. Continuing from my left leg in swimming I walked right across the bedroom to the bathroom/wet room and my left leg was great 🙂 I think it’s really getting there! And as all the people working in brain injury say once something has established itself it won’t go back! So I think […]

Read More Great night too!

Good day!

Today I went swimming and the swim was great. We decided my left leg is getting so much better, much more responsive every time I go! Also found this quote which I think is brilliant and everyone should follow It’s okay to be angry, shit some times happens but dust yourself down and move on. […]

Read More Good day!

Cooking!!

I know I said i was going to calm down on the blogs but sorry I’m not! Too much good stuff going on! NHS physio to painting to in the kitchen again!! Woooo! Homemade chilli out of the diet book 😁 I’ll be back to 8 stone yet!

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Quote

I wasn’t going to blog today after 3 yesterday and putting everyone off by over doing it but just got an email from Linda/mum with this quote she found. “Rehabilitation is about believing in yourself, knowing that you can get better with determination,” Exactly me. Also had a great morning painting! And now for more […]

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Self-consciousness.

I’m feeling very self-conscious cos of my lack of ability to walk etc. I have gotten slightly bigger. I was always teased of being chubby at primary school then I took the ‘dieting’ to the extremes from about 12-15 then I relaxed a wee bit but I was always ‘good’ and controlling. But now I’m […]

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Chicken pie!!

Back in the kitchen again making something I made on a weekly basis prior to all this nonsense, joe wicks chicken pie! You can take the girl out of the kitchen but you can’t take the kitchen out of the girl! Completed chicken pie!!

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Life is difficult

This morning I was sitting by myself and my phone only had 2%. I saw the charger plugged in at the wall but as hard as I tried (very hard) I couldn’t reach it. As I said before it’s crazy how ‘easy’ things are quite difficult now. I never would have realised/thought about it before.

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Saturday Night Da ba da dan dee!

…I like the way you move pretty baby… Had a absolutely fantastic Saturday night with James in our house having dinner, watching rugby and then greys anatomy did a wee bit of good walking too! I’ve given myself to this time next year and I’ll back to Saturday night fever flat out dancing on the […]

Read More Saturday Night Da ba da dan dee!

Offended!!

My dad was talking about the camera I painted… And he said that’s a nice bird! I don’t know whether to be offended or maybe the painting is much worse than I thought. Or maybe he needs glasses for everything now!

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Saturday 1st September

Tired and it’s not even 11am! Woke up early this morning cause I had to be ready for 9am but it was brilliant because after some stretching i walk from the conservatory to the kitchen with the gutter frame after having a seat for 2mins walked straight back! Physio Victoria and I have set a […]

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Living room :)

After my great walk last night another one tonight!! Right into the living room 😀 And as I said Victoria mentioned yesterday about me not needing her soon she said tonight by not helping me too much she had let me shake a few times and correct myself so I could get back to understanding […]

Read More Living room 🙂

Walking

Walking tonight was spectacular! 😀 and Victoria is organising a local church hall thing for walking practice. I’m at the stage now I need a proper bigger distance for walking practice in the gutter frame. 😀 *delighted*

Read More Walking

Made for more.

Made for more. Is a Belfast based Christian organisation. Its focusing on young people at the moment. So schools, youth groups, etc. tonight I went to the launch night held in Newtownbreda Baptist. If you think this is possibly something that would be of use/interest to you or if you’re just a young person who […]

Read More Made for more.

Paintings!

I’m really flat it at this painting. Continued on the cat theme!! Rawrrr And painted a mountainous sunset for James to display at home! Cos then he always has a piece of me there! #cheesy haha.

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New York, New York

Mum and I had wee laugh last night discovering when I say ‘new york’ I actually sound like I’m doing New York accent but I’m not! It really how the tbi has changed my I would have said very good ability to speak and do accents. Nuew Yourka!! 😛

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Super stand!

This afternoon was spent in my home with James 🙂 Stood for a whole episode of greys anatomy plus some so probably an hour and a wee bit all together!! Improvement from last week anyway. And from this picture I don’t actually think last weeks was too bad So I’m definitely on the way up!

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Physio today :)

More electrifying!! In physio today we focused on electrifying my leg! Also had a great wee walk on the gutter frame! As I said in another blog post Victoria said 100% my leg is improving. She no longer has to move my left leg I can do it myself now! She always makes jokes about […]

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Feisty!

Google description: feisty ˈfʌɪsti/ adjectiveinformal 1 (of a person, typically one who is relatively small) lively, determined, and courageous.”a love story with a feisty heroine who’s more than a pretty face” touchy and aggressive. It’s like it’s describing me! Lol I’m definitely wee feisty rebbers! Well James calls me that anyway. It must because I […]

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Physio!!

Tonight my physio was brilliant!! Getting up from the chair myself. And standing in the standing frame with no support behind me. Walked up and down the room 4times with the gutter frame and Victoria made note that my left leg has really improved and more responsive! Which is a good 🙂 the only way […]

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Frank post.

This is a very frank post. So I feel like I should apologise. Who ever thinks they need help to get to the bathroom? No ones ever thinks that. Not from you’re like 2 or 3 and can sort yourself. So that’s a thing I really struggle with the lack of mobility to just walk […]

Read More Frank post.

What is normal?!

Had a lovely evening at auntie karen’s. Just really wish it was properly back to normal makes me question now will it ever be?! Suppose I need to question ‘what is normal anyway!?’

Read More What is normal?!

PT Rebekah

Mum and I decided I could be her personal trainer, cos she really has no bingo wings at 60ish. Helped by me needing her help to get ready etc. As I’ve said before everything has a silver lining!

Read More PT Rebekah

Nudge nudge WINK WINK!

😉 I used to be able to wink with both my left and right eye. NEW DISCOVERY: can’t wink with either now. So don’t ask me to play any games that involve winking or you may feel my wrath! 😉 crazy how much you normally would take for granted.

Read More Nudge nudge WINK WINK!

Butterflies 🦋

I’m watching a program on bbc2 about butterflies and it’s lovely also highlights butterflies are beautiful, delicate and tough. And they have to change and grow! I feel like this is something I can really connect with cos I’d like to think I’m delicate but tough and I will have to grow and change.

Read More Butterflies 🦋

Happy birthday sweet Caroline!

Tonight was the first time back at Caroline’s house for about a 4 weeks after a number of months of going every week! And it was a good cause we were there cause it’s Caroline’s birthday coming up and she going away on a well deserved holiday! So dear knows when I’ll see my lovely […]

Read More Happy birthday sweet Caroline!

Saturday night fever..buzzing!

This evening my mum, me, my godmother and her daughter had a wee night. We had a few drinks and we ordered a Chinese for dinner! Was a super lovely evening 🙂 we also talked about life, it was said even though i had this horrendous injury we can still have the same kind of […]

Read More Saturday night fever..buzzing!

Electrifying!!

This morning Victoria came and did a wee session of physio. Based around giving me wee electric shocks through a wee neurological stimulator thing! Sounds horrific but it wasn’t that bad! Actually we got some positive responses! Ended with a wee dander as usual! 😀

Read More Electrifying!!

F off!

Haha my left hand (wick hand) is always stuck with the middle finger up! Mum and me always laugh about it and mum says lucky she is not easily offended! 🖕🏻🤜🏻👎

Read More F off!

This morning – full on

This morning was great! I started with speaking and breathing exercises and then moved to stretching exercises and did a wee walk! Yay!! Then did a wee bit of painting. 1. Pip was my uncle and grandfathers bird. 2. Flowers for my mums friend and neighbour!

Read More This morning – full on

Broken heart 💔

I know I’ve written something already this evening but I feel awful and I just think seeing everyone getting on with their lives (as they should) is hard. I just saw Christine Lampard doing something about Belfast on tv and she was in town and it made me remember (as I do everyday) how much […]

Read More Broken heart 💔

Great walk!

I had physio this afternoon/evening and it was brilliant!Stretching first then Practiced walking again with great success! Walking has gotten way way better! And my left leg was great too! I really focused on keeping it out as it had been pulling in to right side causing it to always be getting in the way. […]

Read More Great walk!

Today’s art :)

I feel I should make a daily art blog or something! Don’t mean to be boring people with my art but I love doing it so much. I feel like it’s part of my identity now. And it’s a way to express yourself. So sorry if you don’t like it – heads up there will […]

Read More Today’s art 🙂

Quiet day today

After the past 3 very active/busy days I had a quiet day today. So excited to have the physio coming tomorrow morning 🙂 need to have good rest tonight! So… Goodnight and sweet dreams!!

Read More Quiet day today

Dinner! :)

I always was keen in the kitchen Still am but I have to think more than before about what I’m going to cook as I only have one hand for chopping stuff/general cooking But tonight success 😀 Made a pasta dish tonight. Was lovely if I do say so myself! It’s gonna be a frequent […]

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Neighbours

We (mum and I) took a lovely trip over to our neighbours! It’s quite an interesting tale cause the neighbours lived near us in the first family home in Ballygowan and their eldest son is the same age as me and my mum and dad without knowing, basically mirrored their footsteps by coming down here […]

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Today!

Well today has been interesting Started off doing a wee bit of stretching and then I painted a picture for a new cafe I had went to and had lovely buns! 🙂 😀 This afternoon was good. The community ot was here to visit and I am definitely getting a referral to cedar! Hopefully that […]

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Predictable!!

As I was feeling so down (as I usually do in the morning) I made my self walk to the bathroom (unfortunately I needed Linda to support me when I was walking) but it’s moved on now it’s just for balance, no more helped needed to move the left leg it’s just for balance! Hopefully […]

Read More Predictable!!

Town!!

Feel like a wee teenager again…my weekend was made top class by a wee trip ‘into town on Saturday’ haha reliving 2006ish! 🙂 then after went to Stirling for a wee movie and relaxing time. Was good watched one of the hobbit films and a little bit of tv too. I love going down to […]

Read More Town!!

Everest

My great friend Sophie came round on a Friday like she always does faithfully and we had a discussion about my aims and goals! She said what an improvement there has been so far and it’s really appreciated coming from her. We had a big discussion to about how this whole thing is like Everest. […]

Read More Everest

Independence check

Showered myself for the fully and attempted to dry myself! Dried my own hair too after washing it myself! Getting ready to move home!! Hehe! went well for the first time but something to do everyday til I become an expert at one handed everything!

Read More Independence check

A stunning star

Today had lovely visit from my star physio in rabiu 🙂 I am so thankful to her and all she did for me 🙂 and she still looks like a stunning star! Must be cause she is one! Also so full of kindness to she brought me flowers and a cake 🙂

Read More A stunning star

:D so so so happy

I managed to WALK in with Victoria and a stick to meet auntie Karen, uncle John and James who had just arrived before Victoria left. Such a feeling 🙂 so so pleased with myself it felt like such an accomplishment 🙂 was so funny how James described it he said he saw the walking stick […]

Read More 😀 so so so happy

Successful day today :)

I had Physio this evening and it was brilliant 🙂 Stretching and a wee walk as usual but something new too! Got to try the piano 🎹 and though I can’t use two hands yet we are hoping it will be good encouragement for my left just being at the piano again! Really hope it […]

Read More Successful day today 🙂

Looking back!

I’m feeling very pleased. I just look on this video from about a month ago, and it’s really highlighted the recovery is going well. I had never really focused on the videos of me doing stuff before so it was nice/interesting to get grips with stuff I can do better than I thought 🙂

Read More Looking back!

Superpowers!

When we were out at dinner me and James decided if we had superpowers what we have! I picked spreading happiness 🙂 and James would fly! So basically he could carry me flying spreading Happiness 😀 nice idea! If anyone knows how to spread happiness and teach me it would be much appreciated!!

Read More Superpowers!

Piano!!

I was never really fussed that much on piano. I took it for granted I could play and was never fussed on practicing that much. But now that I only have one functioning hand I realise how much I took it for granted. That’s another goal I have for myself – get my left hand […]

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Dumbo!!!

In response to my last post my uncle replied to it with this funny picture 🤣 ‘It depends on how you see it.’

Read More Dumbo!!!

F.U!!

Today one of my pals and I were doing stretching and during it my fingers moved into this shape! (If you’re easily offended look away!) Must have been me subconsciously expressing my feelings – fu left side get a move on!

Read More F.U!!

Thoughts…

At night time they seem to get majorly depressing.., Like say in the next 5 years if the plans don’t change from before the injury. I had planned to get married and start a family. So say I do what I planned regardless of injury but I’m facing major challenges I wasn’t before. My left […]

Read More Thoughts…

Aim high…

Aim high….at least if you fall you’re expecting a long way down! Standing with the rollater. Hopefully soon I’ll be walking about with it! My sights are set high (about 10 weeks!) maybe that’s aiming too high! Who really cares? Not me!

Read More Aim high…

Complaint!

😦 I don’t feel like I deserved any of this by trying to save something else 😦 Don’t mean to sound like a complainer again but I really don’t. *cross with life*

Read More Complaint!

This morning with Physio!!

Mainly stretching on the bed. Stretching my neck was a big point and as usual stretching my left arm and leg. I was working on my balance and pushing myself in the chair to finish a wee walk but now we have to be more picky. My left leg was very responsive and the Physio […]

Read More This morning with Physio!!

Short straw…

I feel like I’ve been dealt a very short straw. It’s so upsetting. I can’t help feeling like this, I want to run away from it all (and funnily enough wish I could run!) ‘When the going gets tough, the tough get going’ i really wish I could get going literally and metaphorically!!

Read More Short straw…

Reflection

James and I had a chat/reflection on ‘my journey’ so far and he said to me I’ve come so far! We had a laugh too. He told me about the first time they had me in a chair in the royal I couldn’t speak properly but apparently you could tell I was totally pissed off/hating […]

Read More Reflection

Shift the sadness.

I just can’t. I feel like I’m having way more sad days than i used to have. Sadness is such a terrible thing that i haven’t experienced before to this extent. But my aunt and cousin arrived today from England so hopefully that will lift my mood.

Read More Shift the sadness.

This is forever

Hopefully with in the next year I’ll be able to walk, start work and move home but have to remember that there is no quick fix. I’m in this for the long run.

Read More This is forever

Goodbye 👋🏻 :(

Tonight I had to say goodbye to my fabulous uncle who goes home to London tomorrow! But I’m so thankful he spent most of the last year here to help my mum and my grandparents and he needs to get back to his own home and life but I feel so lucky and privileged to […]

Read More Goodbye 👋🏻 😦

Physio :)

My physio Victoria has talked/tried a gutter frame before but we’d had little to no success because of my ‘ stupid un-cooperative ‘ left arm but this evening had some success! Gutter frame successful gonna work on using it! 🙂

Read More Physio 🙂

Lazy bones!

Today was good I saw lots of people – Uncle Thomas and granny were up alongside David (James’ dad and my big tall mate!) and this morning I had Victoria for physio back on the walking stick!! Woo! And Victoria encouraged me to have a wee sleep during the day to help with recovery! Again […]

Read More Lazy bones!

Good day all round :)

Today started very well had a good physio session this morning. I was getting up and standing alone with no/little support! Then this afternoon/evening I went to my grandparents were my talented uncle made a lovely meal 🙂

Read More Good day all round 🙂

Bumper Botox Bundle!

Did you know that Botox is used for brain injury? I had to go back today and get 7 injections in my left arm and leg. It wasn’t that painful but it was unpleasant. But it was kind of nice seeing some of the staff (nurses, health care workers, physios etc) who had helped me/cared […]

Read More Bumper Botox Bundle!

Sunday at home :)

I went to my own house and James cooked a lovely dinner! I have trained him well 😛 I also spoke to our neighbour G* for the first time since my accident. I felt so emotional speaking with her, a mixture of happiness and sadness. Happy because I was home and it feels like I’m […]

Read More Sunday at home 🙂

:D

Dee dee na na na Saturday night! Was back at Stirling 🙂 and we sat in the garden to start, then we went in and ordered a Thai meal and watched Dr Strange which was excellent. 🙂

Read More 😀

Of to a good start!

Walked right across my bedroom yayyyy I’ve decided my body is really starting to respond! Success with the stretching of my left arm to!! Gotta keep going don’t give up two great walks today 😀

Read More Of to a good start!

Fun Friday!

Nevermind freaky Friday! Fantastic Friday! Great night with my two friends Sophie and Elizabeth! Lovely food and a few bevvies!

Read More Fun Friday!

Be kind. ALWAYS!

Ogni persona che incontri sta combattendo una battaglia di cui non sai nulla. Sii gentile. Sempre.  -Every person that you meet is fighting a battle that you know nothing about.  Be kind. Always.

Read More Be kind. ALWAYS!

Prefect 10 :)

Back into my size 10 jeans 👖! So happy I’m returning to my ‘normal’ self. I had always watched my weight very carefully. The thing I had struggled with most was my ‘big bum’ so I’m delighted that I’ve got it back to a size 10. 😀 But doesn’t mean I can eat chocolate for […]

Read More Prefect 10 🙂

Terrible tbi

When you look up head injury you get this: Emotional Lability. In some cases, neurological damage after a head injury may cause emotional volatility (intense mood swings or extreme reactions to everyday situations). Such overreactions could be sudden tears, angry outbursts, or laughter. Couldn’t be more accurate! When I wake up it starts low and […]

Read More Terrible tbi

Walking!

Lots of walking today! Yay! So happy I’m practicing the walking everyday! It’s definitely improving! It makes me so happy that it’s getting better! It makes me think give it a year and I’ll hopefully be flying! (Not literally!)

Read More Walking!

Posture

Robert just keeps shouting posture at me!… what does he think that will do?? Makes me cross…

Read More Posture

:) walking stick

It’s been a good day. This morning I entered the exercise room from the stairlift with a walking stick and Victoria But Victoria wasn’t helping was just there incase something went wrong. SUCCESS!!!

Read More 🙂 walking stick

More art…

This is for my cousin Lara Murray who’s wedding was the month before the crash and unfortunately I have zero memory of that. The painting represents the roller coaster I’ve been on during the head injury. Here’s me at the wedding

Read More More art…

Linda’s new car :)

Linda got a new car and it’s so lovely cause I can get into it without any hassle and it’s nice to look at which is a bonus! And Linda has never had a car she really wanted/she’s picked and was really pleased to about it not only being lovely but easy for me and […]

Read More Linda’s new car 🙂

Anger…

I’m filled with so much. I have to go see the wheel chair ot tomorrow and i really don’t want to cause 1. I don’t want it to be highlighted more the obvious thing I require a wheelchair at present. 2. I don’t want to go back to rabiu though tomorrow is not rabiu directly […]

Read More Anger…

Oh deer!!

Oh dear! Haha Had a wee joke this morning with my lovely P.A. Michelle!! Was in the standing frame and the belt nearly came off and I so calmly said oh dear. And Michelle thought i was maybe talking about Sonny’s (the dog) deer toy!! But I literally was saying ‘oh dear!’ But we decided […]

Read More Oh deer!!

Good evening :)

We went to Auntie Karen’s and had a wee mini party 🙂 so good! Glad to get out of Linda’s and sit in the sun for a while 🙂 Have to keep it in my head keep holding on!! Hold tight and don’t let go til you get where you want to be! (Miles away […]

Read More Good evening 🙂

Quotes

“A successful life is one that is lived through understanding and pursuing one’s own path, not chasing after the dreams of others.” Chin-Ning Chu Don’t be a dream chaser be a doer. “Regardless of your lot in life, you can build something beautiful on it.” Zig Ziglar Always aim high! Be brave.

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Goals

Went out with my super faithful friend who is the ot. Was a lovely time we had at seapark and we also set a few goals together for us both! We will be able to go for a jog together at Seapark! Ill be able to touch my toes 🙂 We can go for a […]

Read More Goals

Weekend starting off right!

My friend and lucky for me is a beautician came and did my eyelashes and nails for the weekend Woohoo! Ready for the weekend 🙂 we had a funny conversation cause James is going to Glasgow for the weekend and it’s nearly dinner time, so we decided I’m HANGRY Hungry plus angry!!

Read More Weekend starting off right!

Great Physio again…

But emotional in a different way… physio Victoria was here and the session was great 🙂 Used the walking frame again and did four laps of the room! But during the session we talked about ‘my crap’ arm and I asked if it would eventually work and she explained the brain is a complicated thing. […]

Read More Great Physio again…

Physio!! I love going…

…but sadly Carrie is retiring. But got to look at all the positives! Carrie has helped me get this far and it’s very early days in the ‘ journey’ and she deserves a good rest. We talked today about how when I first went to her I couldn’t even sit up on my own but […]

Read More Physio!! I love going…

Just what I needed

My hilarious uncle who I’ve talked about before sent me a hilarious email in reply to my post ‘sadness’. He’s the smart one of the family so we pretend he’s the doctor. He emailed me back from the sadness post saying he was going to prescript me a pill That was just the laugh I […]

Read More Just what I needed

Sadness

I feel so sad and broken. I would do anything to fix all this. I don’t know how to get out of this despair. Help? Anyone?

Read More Sadness

Happy today!

After being so worried/conscious about my weight cos i was a fat mess when I got home from hospital (9st 2 from 7st 12) I weighed myself today (8st 7) so though it’s not perfect it’s going in the right direction 🙂 and when I’m up on my feet (which will hopefully be soon) it […]

Read More Happy today!

27th

I could say I’ve avoided death twice. I was supposed to be born on the 27th February but my mum was brought in on the 16th, 11days early. The doctor was very clever about it, my dad had cancelled a work trip to be home for my due date (27th) but the doctor said to […]

Read More 27th

Last night of holiday…

Last night of this family holiday and it’s been great!! I feel like this trip has brought us closer together 🙂 We all went out for the last supper together tonight! Was so nice and it was even better that no one was put under pressure 🙂

Read More Last night of holiday…

Cushion Comfort

Im so happy by beautician sent me a photo of her family home featuring one of my Sonny cushions 🙂 And also had a fantastic day/ evening with the Anderson’s 🙂

Read More Cushion Comfort

Work in progress!

We have decided that my ‘crap’ arm as I call it has got a new name. We are now going to call it the ‘work in progress’ arm ! Gotta give it a chance to grow and develop like a wee newborn baby!!

Read More Work in progress!

Fab!!

Had a great day today for my first day in Donegal! 🙂 Managed the journey here and another long drive without being sick this time… that’s a story for another day! Was emotional leaving home as it felt like I was leaving home for the first time all over again but Linda needs the holiday […]

Read More Fab!!

Pop and I in the house

My pop (grandfather) and I were in the house (just us). My mum and granny went out to shops. It really brought to my attention how effected my speech has been. Not cause I can’t talk, but my pop is so deaf. I had to speak extra clearly and loudly and it was hard and […]

Read More Pop and I in the house

Walking stick practice!! Lol

Granny has arrived :p Had Victoria for Physio this morning and was a success!! Got to stand with a walking stick and though I wasn’t walking it was just to practice lifting it while standing and it was a success! Victoria reduced the support she was giving me and I held my balance and I […]

Read More Walking stick practice!! Lol